21 October 2010

Aw, bitch, bitch, bitch...

I drink a lot less water than I should. This may be a good thing, since it seems like someone put stupid chemical in it-and not just here. It's all over the country.

Fer example:

We have 5 bridges over the Mississippi River here in the area, and it seems like two of them are being repaired at any one time. One of the other three has a breakdown sitting on it on the afternoon rush. Usually it's a 1980's vintage minivan with a tie rod that snapped and a large woman calling for help on a cell phone. It isn't the same vehicle, of course, but the preceding description always seems to fit. Add to that several road blockages with bits of pavement in various stages of completion.

Maybe, and I know this is a radical idea-start a project and FINISH it, then move on to the next one! Don't tear up a piece of road and leave it for a month. Same with the bridges. And maybe do some of the work at night when you're not backing up traffic for a mile or more.

Some of the drivers here having been drinking the eau de stupid as well. There's a right lane closure coming up. Everyone is trying to merge, except for one nimrod in a pickup two cars in front of me who's driving down the middle, clogging both lanes. Oh, for a roof-mounted 40mm grenade launcher...

The genius who designed the approaches to the I-74 bridge put two on-ramps within 200 feet of each other right before gettinng onto the bridge. This set-up is the same on both the Illinois and Iowa side of the river. About 3:30, the traffic clogs up with all of the after-work people trying to merge. It slows to a crawl for an hour or so until things clear up. Things go good if the merging traffic alternates with the traffic on the interstate.  Unfortunately, there are very few people who seem to have mastered this. One guy merges and two others try to sneak in. Somebody's going to get into a sideswipe sometime. And they'll both probably hit the minivan stuck on the bridge anyway.

Finally, my last driving hint. You don't HAVE to come to a complete stop to make a right turn onto a side street or driveway, just slow down enough to do the turn safely. It's not steering an aircraft carrier through the locks of the Panama Canal. You're holding up the traffic. Let's go-while we're young!

We also have the midterm elections coming up-all of the House and 1/3 of the Senate. There's been a barrage of commercials for the various candidates, all saying the other guy's going to raise taxes, he buggers horses, and voting for him will cause the demise of the Republic. All they're proving is if you're an absolute failure at doing anything out here in the world, you maybe should consider running for an elected office. Shrill bunch on both sides. Somebody humor me and tell me it's the same where you're at. One of the things on the ballot this year that will get my vote is the proposed amendment to the Illinois Constitution that would allow the people to recall a governor should it become necessary. Not yes but hell yes on that. Our governors on both sides have been caught with their hands in the cookie jar. I'd be in favor of recalling ANY elected official that isn't doing his or her job.

Oh, yes, almost forgot. A while back I wrote about the prospect for Amtrak passenger rail service coming through here. Today we got $10 million to go ahead and build a depot. The pollies are all gaga because that'll provide 750 jobs building the station.

Problem is, I haven't seen where anything has come through to actually FUND the line. Why do I have a vision of a shiny new Amtrak station alongside the Iowa Interstate Railroad, waiting for a train that wasn't funded? What is it that I smell?  Oh, yes...the smell of pork. This has all the characteristics of a classic Boondoggle (Boondoggilus politicus maximus).

Oh, piss on it. Reckon I've bitched enough for one night.

We're going to play YD's Wheel of Fortune now. The theme is "Australian Musicians Named 'Young'".

Who will come up on the Big Wheel? Will it be George Young? Angus? Malcolm? Someone step up and give it a spin!


Awww! You hit the one spot with the Disco Young...John Paul!

No, you don't get to spin again. Nothing to be done for it except dust off the platform shoes and practice your basic hustle, samba, or merengue.

Better luck next time!

yankeedog out.


  1. Stupid the universal contaminant.The guy behind me got on his horn because I was letting the right turn traffic (reverse that for over there) turn in front of me. You know that long line of cars following the extra long station wagon with all their lights on. To top it off we then sat at the railway boom gates. Stupid here too.

  2. I hate many people at the moment.

  3. Not the great Andrew 'The other Angus' Young from Flange Gasket I see. Need another spin

  4. Bangar-There's always someone who does something at a railroad crossing. Truly amazing.

    Moko-I hate many people most of the time.

    Doc-Of course! How could I have forgotten...Flange Gasket?