Ooh, look-a Magnetbox!!

I'm off on a secret assignment for the weekend-but I'll leave you with some pics of knockoff products-the kind you find in third-world bazaars, dollar stores, and flea markets all over the world. Some good stuff here!

Now, there's nothing with the PolyStation, but I'm more of an XBux 350 fan.

'Curse you, Spader-Man', said his nemesis, Green Goober.

SuperBat-patrolling the streets of Gothamopolis on his, umm...Bat-skateboard?!?

Well, you should see Politic Pat/He's so good looking like a big yellow rat/Him and his sister/In a polythene blister/You should see Politic Pat/Yeah yeah yeah

(thanks to John, Paul, George, and Ringo for help on that one)

It was a Laser Sword, like this one, in the hands of Lark Starstider that struck down Emperor Pulpytine and his apprentice, Garth Vandal.

Few people know that Omni Consumer Products developed Robert Cop first. Unfortunately, he had aluminum armor and the CPU of a Sinclair ZX-81. He was flimsy, slow, stupid, and wouldn't load programs properly off his cassette drive. RoboCop was a much better model.

Hi-ho Silver, awaaay! To the Bat-Cave!

Oh, my God! ...We finally really did it! You maniacs!! You created a cheap knockoff of one of the most successful sci-fi-properties of the 20th Century and aren't paying any royalties! Ah, damn you!! God damn you all to hell!!!

Faster than a speeding sloth! More powerful than a SmartCar! Able to leap a cardboard box in a single bound! It's a pigeon! It's a Piper Cub! No-it's Specialman!!

My boss is a Jewish carpenter. My national symbol is a Kentucky Colonel and a fried chicken tycoon.

Cheers all!

yankeedog out.

Cinema desolee

Many things have changed in the last 15-20 years, of course, but one of the things that has changed that I find interesting is the evolution of the movie theater.

The town I grew up in had a single-screen theatre, the Times. I remember as a 9-year-old getting in to see Jaws. Scared the snot out of me then. In 1980 the owners made it a TWO-screen venue-we hit the big time!

If we were flush and it wasn't a school night, we could pile in the car and go to Clinton, where they had the Cinema I and II, the Capri, and the Clinton Drive-In if you wanted to see or do something questionable and/or sleazy.

Now if it were a big night, we'd go the 100 km to the Quad Cities. There were a ton of theaters down here-Cinema I, the Parkway, and the Oasis, Corral, Semri, and Memri drive-ins. My friend JP's mom, in a bout of temporary insanity, took a bunch of us to see The Empire Strikes Back at the Parkway-in addition to a visit to Pizza Hut and a drop by the arcade in the mall (Omega Race, Tail Gunner, Galaxian...ah, we'll not see the likes of those games too much anymore). Great fun!

Today, of course, most movie theaters are big multiplexes, with 15 screens, reclining stadium seats, bags of popcorn big enough to feed a horse and pop enough to float a yacht. The projection technology has inproved vastly even since the 90s. I suppose the comfort level has gone up a lot.

One of the first 'multiplex' cinemas in the area was the Showcase Cinemas on the north side of Davenport. It opened with a lot of fanfare in 1989 (5, count 'em, 5! screens) and operated all through the 1990s. I saw many a film there, as did a lot of people in the area. Unfortunately, advancements in technology and the changing flow of people to a new area of shops and restaurants spelled the end, and after a brief 12 years the Showcase Cinemas moved to a new building and the old place was put up for sale (read: abandoned). A short career for what was a state-of-the-art facility!!

Recently, it was decided to demolish the building and replace it with a large, empty flat spot. Probably this is a good idea since people would break in and create the Midwest's biggest crackhouse, if they hadn't already.
The people demolishing the building were opening it to the public and selling the theater seats-$15 a piece and you pull them out (bring a 7/16" socket wrench!) and haul them away.

You can see a gallery of pictures from the old Showcase here. An interesting behind-the-scenes look at a movie theater mixed in with some urban exploration. And the popcorn kettles are still there, if you want them! Great for movie night for you, your family, and 150 or so of your friends!

Finally, a couple of other theater notes. The movie business isn't all big, sterile multiplexes. 2001. I was in the town of Moose Lake, Minnesota-smack dab in the Land of 10,000 Lakes. We saw Enemy At The Gates at the local show. $3 to get in, fancy painted interior in the theater, and popcorn that had been popped that night-with real butter on top! A nice old small-town place to see a flick.

My mom told me about the time they went to Three Forks, Montana to visit my stepdad's relatives. Three Forks was a railroad stop, a couple of bars, and not much else-but they did have a theater. The folks went to the show that night, and the manager announced that if six people didn't show up, they wouldn't run the movie! Can't blame them-it'd cost more to keep the lights on than to show a film to two people. Evidently they got the requisite six, no doubt coming to relax after a long day in the shopping, big business, and general cosmopolitan delights that a town-no, the town-in that part of Montana has to offer. But still, funny to hear.

Any theater stories out there?

yankeedog out.

More Fail pics

First, for Memorial Day-thanks to all of our veterans, ours and even those of our allies. Without your effort, the nation would be a different (and not necessarily better) place. Well done!

A few pictures for your perusal, from the always-funny Failblog:

In about .02 second, that's gonna really hurt...

Nothing says 'Baby Party' like a pack of Marlboro 100s. Those smokes would cost $25 a pack if you used a claw machine to vend them!

No funny comments on this one. Raccoons are very prone to rabies. This is just flat freakin' dumb!

This is from my favorite movie-Faceplant 2: Electric Boogaloo!

Looking at you, Spiderman!

Thanks, Chad, for making all of us Cub fans look like ass-clowns!! Why don't you go pull for the Cardinals with the rest of the mouth-breathers!

Can't necessarily argue with this...

Of course the first thing I would think of if I got my watch in salt water is to eat the thing!

Gets them ready for the Indian rail system-1 engine, 12 cars, 73182 passengers.

You know, I also wish they still made utes here as well. You guys at Ford seeing this?

I can get that bottle of Boone's Farm Strawberry on the top shelf! I don't need some candy-ass ladder to reach up there...

Cheers all!

yankeedog out.

Huh?!?

I could write about a lot of things this week-like the general nincompoopery of the Illinois state government, or the tensions on the Korean peninsula, or why certain nations have the idea that we should keep illegal immigrants in our country when those same nations won't tolerate illegal immigration in their own land, or any one of half a dozen other things. But I don't feel like getting too riled up, or actually having to grind the mental gears with an attempt of cogent thought.

So we'll make fun of signmakers instead.

The situation when the step is bad is that the gravity causes you to fall.

After three years, the government decides to taking payoff from copyright infringers!

I looked this guy up. Sir Fried, Lord Collifolawar. 18th century British general who won the Battle of Collifolawar, which gave England control of India. Brilliant leader and tactician.

I recommend this place for the next 'Burger gathering. I likes me some stewwed salty bone and meat, and eel tube maws in casserole. Awesome!

Actually, the word translation is perfect on this sign. There is, however, the pesky little matter of  sentence order...

I have one word for you. Just one word, Hashimoto-san. Prastics.

Hey, Wang! You been drinking bleach again? WTF?

I could go for a cod drink right about now!

Humburger in paradise/medium rare with mustard be nice/Heaven on earth with an onion slice/I'm just a humburger in paradise.

You know what? This actually makes as much sense as anything else in Windows!

OK, OK!!! So you slammed your hand in the shutter box! Don't have a knob! Geez, what a pansy!

Honey, tonight let's go down to the Containing-void Pavilion!

yankeedog out.

It's a long way to Nindigully...

Over the last day or so, I've had occasion to read Havock's and Mayhem's accounts of H's Big Night Out, and I have to say that, while it looks like a good time was had by all, that many people in one place would bother this writer. I'm not good around people, and given that many of you regulars have been places and have real post-secondary educations, I think I'd come across as rather provincial. If y'all didn't leave the party, I probably would sneak out early and give everyone a break.

You all can get together in your big cities Down Under. But if I ever get to Australia, I'm looking up this place, which MickH forwarded me an email about a few months back. Because I'll be honest-this looks more like my speed.

The Nindigully Pub On The River. Free Camping, Showers, and Fishing! What's not to like? I suspect what's called a 'river' around those parts corresponds to a 'creek' (or as we pronounce it, 'crick') here in the Midwest. It's Queensland's Oldest Pub-quite possibly with some of Queensland's Oldest Pub-Goers regularly inhabiting the place.

I like the decor, although the place appears to be a bit clean for my taste. Substitute the 'XXXX' for 'Budweiser', and maybe a NASCAR poster or big Cubs or Bears schedule on the wall, and it could be any one of several places I know of around here.

A lot of people think that the watering holes in small towns can be boring. Not necessarily. I've seen most of my bar brawls in little hole-in-the-wall places. A lot of times, if the local law enforcement is a 15-20 minute drive away, things can get interesting. An old Russian saying in relation to Siberian affairs goes 'God is high up and the Tsar far away.' The Almighty may not be interested and the law is a piece and a bit away. You're on your own, or dependent on the mercies of the bartender.

But the Nindigully doesn't look too menacing. Looks comfortable, at least to me. And it has that 'If this place could talk...'appearance.

I'm told the house culinary specialty is this Cow in a Bun. Supposedly the burger patty weighs in at arounds 5 lbs. and the whole thing will feed 1-4 people. Not a bad deal for $36 local! If 1 person can finish all that, I reckon he'd look a bit like a python digesting a goat afterwards. And you might want to keep the bathroom clear-what goes in must come out. You all can get out here and I'll buy you ONE burger. There'd probably be enough for everyone!

More atmosphere I can relate to. I see a sign for Oliver Tractors on the wall (a company that hasn't been around for a long while-but you still see the odd Oliver soldiering on around a few farms), and a John Deere flag as well. I'm starting to feel at home here! Oh, and a Massey-Ferguson sign! Awesome! Still some M-F gear around as well.

I reckon if I hit the shores of the Great Southern Land, I'll get me to the Nindigully Pub. You all are welcome to show up for YD's Big Night Out. And you all have a good time.

I'll be on the veranda, sipping on a beer and watching the sun go down.

-------

The Nindigully reminds of a (somewhat) local establishment (well, it's about 160 km north of me).

This is Breitbach's Country Dining and Bar, in Balltown, Iowa (population 'round about 120). Breitbach's lays claim to being Iowa's oldest bar (established in 1852), and legend has it that the famous outlaw Jesse James stayed here on his way to the Northfield raid up in Minnesota, back in the 1870s.

Breitbach's is a local institution which does a brisk business with the locals (it is the only place within a 10 mile radius), bikers, and tourists, especially in the autumn. The scenery is magnificent, as Balltown sits on a ridge overlooking the Mississippi Valley and the Land of Cheddar (Wisconsin).

If any of YOU ever get here, we'll make the run up there. I'll buy the first round and we'll do a proper Midwest farm-family nosh, where no one goes away hungry. If it's the right time of the year you'll be treated to some truly fantastic scenery as well.

The original Breitbach's burnt down a few years back, and the area merchants and people pulled together to build a brand-new place-which burnt down about six months after it opened! Third time's a charm, though, and yet another building has gone up and the family is serving up food and beer to all and sundry.

And the business goes on-Stars and Stripes and the banner of our local National Guard division, the 34th (Red Bull) Mech Infantry, flying.

Often the best places are slightly off the beaten path.

yankeedog out.

Freeze-Frames

A few screen captures from the great world of television:

And they said Fox leaned conservative! If that's the reaction when the Dow goes up 174, I gotta see what happens if it goes up 300 points!

I don't much care to see Lee Corso giving me college football thoughts on Saturday morning, either.

I always laugh when I see the name of Dick Pound, Actually, I have heard of the man, and he's big in the Olympic anti-doping field. I'd be angry, too, if I had his name.

Uh-oh. Some reporter fell for the oldest trick in the book. Give the reporter a name like 'Mike Litoris' and you and your friends get a laugh when the segment gets played at 6pm. Sounds like my radio name-Heywood Jablomie!

Yeah, that'd be a problem, the truck sliding in the spooge puddles and all...

It IS full of fiber, and possibly that would save a step when on the toilet...

For a grand total of 193%! Looke like Chicago voter math happening here. I believe the three UK PM candidates got the same percentage of votes.

And that's the way the Yankees play baseball-balls to the wall, wang out!

It isn't often that you see the Boner Shot in billiards.

Then I screwed a gumball machine. And a squirrel.

Damn! That's Warp 2.6! It should be halfway to Alpha Centauri by now!

You see the moon from here, and it doesn't look nearly as big as your average elephant. I think the judges have to review her answer.

Go figure.

yankeedog out.

YD's goblet collection

I went through the cupboard the other day and I've found that I accumulated several items from the various local teams and ballparks. Yes, I'm one of those who saves those 'souvenir' mugs and glasses. Not that they have any great value, but they're a good size to drink from if you want something that will last half a day.

I'd bet any of you who frequent local sports venues have a stack of these stashed away somewhere.

Got one from the local nines, the River Bandits, emblazoned with the logo of Modern Woodmen Park and the team logo and mascot, Rascal the Raccoon.

Yes, that's a can of WD-40 on the left. It works perfectly as a non-caloric cooking spray.

A glass from the Peoria Chiefs. This has been around a while-I don't think I've been to O'Brien Field since 2005.

I may have to work on collecting glasses from every team in the Midwest League. That'd be a noble goal, wouldn't it? Sure it would!

A Cubs cup from two or three years ago. Although its volume is about 2/3 the size of the first two, that Major League beverage probably cost $2-$3 more. Go figure.

Finally, the travel mug available at the refreshment stands at Soldier Field. When on the Chicago lakefront during the fall and winter, a lot of hot chocolate gets sold in these mugs at the Bears games.

Anyone else got some glasses from their local teams?

yankeedog out.